Words of Faith...

In the last two years since Kacie has gotten sick, I have spent so much time in hospitals. Over 350 nights of lonely, fearful hours wondering what was happening to my family and why we had been chosen to go through such a trial.   At first, angry at the lot we had inherited in life and later, grateful beyond words for the ways of God, with a full spectrum of emotions in between.  Now, as we near the latter part of our journey with cancer, I can look back and see such a transformation in myself spiritually.  I have been a Christian for many, many years, but never in my life have I had such a depth of understanding and insight into the ways of God.  My beliefs were always so shallow, so me-centered.  What can God do for me? How can He bless me today at church? My prayers consisted mainly of requests for myself and others instead of praising and worshiping Him.  I chose the church I wanted to attend based on what it had to offer me and if the music suited me and the way I liked to worship.  Reading my Bible was a chore that I just couldn't seem to make a habit because other things always got in the way or were of a higher priority.  I knew lots of Bible verses, but I had no real depth of understanding of their context or how they fit into the grand scheme of God's redemptive plan outlined in His Word.  This scenario seems to be pervasive though in today's churches and I'm sure many people can relate to feeling this way or having this type of selfish, shallow brand of Christianity.  For many years, I thought I "got it" when it came to being a Christian but it is amazing what happens to a person when their world gets turned upside down. 

Night after night as I sat up watching Kacie suffer, I found myself diving into the only thing I knew could really offer any kind of solace in such an awful situation. I spent hours upon hours in God's Word studying various topics.  I began realizing that God is truly SOVEREIGN in our lives, over our plans, over our will, and yes even over our suffering.  Contrary to what I had been taught, God not only allows but even sometimes orchestrates suffering in our lives in order to accomplish His purposes.  His goal is not to keep us healthy, wealthy and happy in this life, it is to mold and shape our character, refining us and conforming us to be more like Him.  He is preparing us for eternity with Him and as we go through trials and suffering, we begin to change into the person He wants us to become.   If we allow Him to work on us in any and every situation, we will begin to become more eternally-minded and that changes everything.   As a result of the last two years worth of continuous trials and all the extra time in the Word, I have learned so much about what it truly means to follow Christ no matter the cost. I thank God for this time to dig in and discover the truth about so many important things.  

Just like my reaction to Kacie's cancer brought out many emotions and different view points, other people have also approached us with many different types of reactions and philosophies.  Not only have we been given advice on how to physically cure the cancer with various concoctions to try, but we have been given spiritual advice from a wide range of people with a wide range of beliefs. We were told that if we had enough faith when we prayed that she would be healed. We were told she was already healed (despite her continual battle with one complication after another and the recurrence of cancer) and that we shouldn't accept any other verdict in the matter.  We were told that God uses trials to accomplish His will; we were told that God allows trials but Satan is the one who makes us sick.  We were told that it is never God's will for someone to be sick, that it must be from some type of sin in our lives, and we were chastised for even speaking about anything but healing.  So, I began to question what the appropriate response should be from a Christian going through such a trial.  I started really studying this topic in the Bible, looking at how Jesus handled trials and how He taught others to do the same.  The things I was learning from the Bible didn't seem to line up with what some Christian people were telling us about how to handle cancer.  This sparked my desire even more to search for the truth in the scriptures to make sure we were living out our faith in the midst of this trial and responding as God would want us to.  I suddenly didn't long for that me-centered version of Christianity that I had known for so long...I really felt like our ultimate goal in the matter should be to use this trial and all the opportunities it would bring for God's glory instead of just praying for what would benefit us the most.  Of course we wanted Kacie healed, but is it wrong to believe that maybe it wasn't God's will for her to be healed ? And is it wrong for us to be ok with that if it means reaping eternal rewards in countless lives  in people across the country? What is the appropriate Biblical response?

To get to the bottom of these challenging questions with which we were struggling, I started an extensive study on the different view points we were presented with.  This led me to the realization of some false doctrines that are creeping into the churches, namely the Word of Faith Movement (aka the Prosperity/Health and Wealth Gospel).  My study on this topic has been eye-opening and life-changing.  This movement includes the teachings of the majority of tv preachers on "Christian" channels and unfortunately is making its way into mainstream Christian churches.  This movement is dangerous because it twists scripture and uses verses taken completely out of context to support ideas that are contrary to what the rest of the Bible teaches.  The movement teaches that God wants every believer to be wealthy and healthy and that with enough faith, you never have to be sick or financially unstable.  Apparently  if the one praying doesn't see healing, then they don't have enough faith.  They sell God's blessings on TV by claiming that if you just "sow a seed of faith" God will send unprecedented financial gain your way. They also teach that Christians, through the Holy Spirit, have the power to control their situations in life by the words they speak. This is actually a belief that stems from Christian Science and New Age beliefs, not from the Word of God (unless of course you take scripture out of context and then you can get it to mean whatever you want). These teachings elevate man and de-elevate Christ by suggesting that our words have more power over our situation than the will of God for our lives that was decided before we were even born.  The Word of Faith preachers teach that Christians are in fact "little gods" because we are created in the image of God and that is why we have the "power of life and death in the tongue" or in the words we speak.  (Yet another verse taken out of context).  I have heard preachers claim that we have just as much power to speak authority into our situations as God had when He spoke the world into existence.  They claim that Christians can even control the weather and that no Christian is ever supposed to be sick or poor.  They claim that God has no power to work on this earth unless we give Him permission.  I have seen hours of footage of claims such as these that make a mockery of the true Gospel taught in God's Word.  The theme throughout the entire New Testament is that we will experience trials, suffering, and persecution in this life and that we should do this with joy since we are joining in the sufferings of Christ (too many verses to support this to even list). Unfortunately, a lack of depth of Biblical knowledge and a lack of spiritual discernment keeps those of us who have fallen into these false teachings (myself included in the past) from seeing the truth.  The true gospel is so much more...

The discoveries I have listed here are only the tip of the iceberg of the false teachings that are making their way into people's homes through the tv and into many churches. If you would like to know more, I would be glad to give you resources or speak with you about the things I have learned.  A few videos that are great to start with if you are interested in learning about the Word of Faith Movement are listed below.  They are teachings from the Strange Fire Conference hosted by John MacArthur and a host of other pastors that set out to examine and expose these false teachings.  They include loads of real video footage of very famous pastors teaching very incorrect teachings to very large crowds...wow. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8XTwTLe-e8E

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_MyrzqLWuU

* If these web addresses don't work, you can go to You Tube and type in Strange Fire Conference Justin Peters and you will find his two sessions from the conference. 


If you are a Christian and have been confused like I was by what others around you are claiming or if you want to be informed about what is being taught in some churches, please watch.  Parts of these videos made my jaw drop at the blasphemies that some are accepting as truths. If you are in this movement or currently believe some of these teachings, please watch.  Examine the teachings and test the scriptures instead of just accepting them based on a few scriptures taken out of context.  We are commanded in the Bible to test everything against scripture. If you believe a verse says one thing but there are other scriptures that say the opposite, then obviously there is more context to the story that will help in harmonizing the scriptures. 

Sitting here now, almost two years since our journey with cancer began and my quest for truth commenced, it all makes sense.  I understand where the reactions of some stem from now.  I see where the mixed views come from of how to handle trials.  And I am so grateful for where this journey has taken me.  For the spiritual transformation that I have undergone, I am so thankful.  As I have learned to deal with the worst trial imaginable for a parent to go through, I have learned that no matter what, God is SOVEREIGN.  Not me.  Not my words or my decisions.  The same God who created such a vast and complex universe is in charge of my situation and I am eternally grateful that it is not my actions that determine Kacie's outcome.  I have learned that it is in fact ok to believe that God's will is being played out even though it may not be the same as my will.  Contrary to what I have been told, I do not lack faith because my daughter has not been healed and I have not given up hope just because I am willing to accept whatever God has in store for her.  On the contrary, my faith is stronger than ever and my hope is not only in healing of Kacie's physical body, but a deeper healing that has already taken place.  I have seen healing in so many people and relationships because of the battle that she graciously decided to go through in order to bring God glory.  I have seen lives changed and hearts mended; I have witnessed miracles in the lives of people all around me as a result of Kacie's cancer.  I believe that there will be eternal rewards for people all over the country as a result of our journey. I have learned that even as I sit by her bed in this hospice facility and wait for whatever God decides to do, that I can rest in His peace knowing that we have been faithful and willing to walk where others said we shouldn't...and that, I believe, is the appropriate Biblical response to our trials.